Redefining My Future and Identity

I used to identify myself as a social entrepreneur, but suddenly that identity became too narrow. I then identified myself as a healer, and a medicine person, but then my healing potential became severely capped. I am definitely a father, but what that means seems unclear and emerging.

I've had many identities of myself over many decades (snowboarder, partier, banker, conscious, liberal, blah blah blah), but all of them seem to fall away as I develop. It seems that I am both greater than, and neither than any box I try place myself into. In fact, I’m also sometimes the opposite.

I have recently even placed my identity as 'the witness', as it is was something to become. But I am always witnessing, regardless if my attention is there or not. So, then perhaps I’m nothing, but seemingly ‘separately’ watching something, which are my thoughts, feelings, emotions, and my whole life.

Many spiritual folks and sages call this ‘cliche’, its all ONE. But seemingly, having gone through a tough period in my life, with extreme anxiety and physical pain, I attached myself to the witness too, doing countless meditations and mindful practices. Can I let that soft, warm ‘witness’ identity go too. But what happens then?

It seems whatever I am, my future is so unknown, so mysterious, that even trying to envision it doesn't do it justice. Although plans are happening all the time, they seem spontaneous without 'me' really doing them. They are happening whether I like it or not. I vacillate between painful, meaningful, blissful, anxious thoughts and experiences. I both see myself (personality) developing or expanding, my business and relationships starting to flourish, but I don't feel in control of any of it.

I write this because, it really shapes how I support myself and others in their future, whether personally or in business. Is there a possibility that the future of business, is really just about letting the evolution of nature, just flow through us. Hasn't it always just been that way, and we need to align or just acknowledge, with what is already happening.

Who we call the villain today, could become the saviour tomorrow. Perhaps we don't have to escape duality, but embody it. And this is already happening to all of us ... no one and someone are simultaneously doing this. Don't we want to live a life in awe of the mystery, than play silly games of imagining or controlling what your future self or business could look like?